The Internet Is Stressing Me Out

by Marian Schembari on May 7, 2010

It’s 2:30am right now and as an 80-year-old trapped in the body of a 23-year-old, it’s significantly past my bedtime. Seriously, I’m usually in bed by 10 or 11, but for the past week or so I’ve been going completely insane and I blame the internet.

Granted, I have been reading a bunch of business books lately… I finished The Help but instead of continuing on with fiction I moved onto The 4-Hour Workweek and am now reading Trust Agents. I highly recommend all three books, by the way, but I think I need to stick to reading entertaining books before sleep because my heart was beating a mile a minute tonight as I lay in bed staring at the ceiling – thinking about all the things I need to do to make a living and start my own business. As one friend said, “Ahh… the entrepreneurial dream.”

Tomorrow I need to finish a post I’ve spent weeks working on, tackle 3 other research-heavy articles for a new client,and continue being awesome for my other clients. Then I need to write my posts for next week. I’m also in a business coaching program, so I’m active in that forum and need to make sure I’m following the lessons and listening to the courses. That reminds me, I can’t forget to actually download them tomorrow.

Then of course there’s the Pajama Job Hunt. I’m almost done with the Twitter series, but then I have to tackle the 4 other videos which need to be scripted. I have various guest posts that need writing, HARO queries that need pitching, comments that need responses, tweets that need retweeting, a book that needs reviewing… I even created a separate email account JUST to deal with Twitter, thinking it might be good to not have that distraction every time I had a new follower. Except now there’s this backlog of Twitter shit I need to go through. So much for that tactic.

Not me, but I totally have that computer.

I  want to make sure I don’t dissapear online, which means more twittering on my end, answering questions on LinkedIn, posting comments on various blogs… The list goes on.

I have this handy dandy Firefox Extension that lets me tag something to read later, but my list just keeps growing. It never gets smaller and those articles rarely get read.

Maybe it’s because it’s now almost 3 in the morning and I’m still not tired and can’t even begin to fathom all the things that need doing, but I blame the internets for stressing me out. I’m always distracted by something new, some  awesome blogger I need to check out, some great newsletter I need to read. People I need to follow, connections yet to be made. Things I need to learn to start my own business. New new new more more more. Always. Never ending.

Did I mention that I’m leaving for London on the 19th and I’ll be gone for 3 weeks? And all this work needs to get done before then so I can at least partially enjoy my favorite city in the world?

Yeah. Holy crap.

Am pretty sure I’m going to regret writing this in the morning as I realize this resembles a diary entry more than a blog post. Not like I’m ever really that professional, but I’m afraid this makes me come off as incompetent or disorganized. I’m awesome at all my jobs, let me just remind you of this fact. But this weird moment of weakness is something I’m compelled to share. Maybe to prove a point that I don’t bullshit. Maybe to come across as more of a real live person. To be relatable. I don’t know.

An old college friend recently wrote me, saying that being able to read about my own journey helped ease her own “angst” about not having something lined up after college. Angst is right. I know I’m finally on the right path and all… but fuck if it’s not stressful.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
  • Marian Schembari

    {latest post} The Internet Is Stressing Me Out http://bit.ly/9Hoowv

  • http://twitter.com/marianschembari/status/13549735427 Marian Schembari

    {latest post} The Internet Is Stressing Me Out http://bit.ly/9Hoowv

  • stephanerd

    Ah, the sleep patterns of those who love what they're doing. Two nights ago, I lay down after a day of blogging, copy editing, career coaching, and back-and-forth e-mailing only to toss and turn until 2 a.m., thinking about all the work I had to get done the next day at my part-time web magazine job (which included four meetings and work on a blog I was launching for the site). I've been tossing and turning for weeks now! Last night, I had my first deep sleep in what seems like eons. I think it was only a result of my being overtired, and my having had a (few) glass(es) of wine before bed. Maybe we should start a support group, in which we share successful meditation techniques and whatnot.

    And I totally hear you on the Twitter. These days, I don't have much time to be on Twitter all the time, so I end up bookmarking things and spending a couple hours late at night catching up. It's ridiculous.

    Don't worry about seeming weak or disorganized. This is what we all go through.

  • alexisgrant

    I can totally relate to this. I often stay up too late on the Internet. And it's not like I'm playing FarmVille. There's so much to learn! Blogs to read, videos to watch, ideas to ponder.

    For me, this was a real distraction while trying to write my book (and also a welcome form of communication, since writing can be lonely). And I'm a believer of integrating the Internet and social media into my day, not isolating it to one particular hour, because I don't think I get the most out of it that way. But what's the solution to keep it from becoming overwhelming? I don't know. I think it's somewhere in finding your priorities and sticking to them. If you fall behind on Twitter — or need to schedule tweets for a few days to focus on other things — so be it. You'll be back.

    I want to hear more about Trust Agents.

  • http://www.jargonwriter.com Melissa Breau

    Hey — nice to know that we all end awake until ridiculous hours because of “mundane” things like twitter, linkedin, back work, etc.

    If there's any way I can help you know how to reach me ….

  • nblades

    This post made me laugh out loud because I can SO relate to what you're talking about. I love the internet and how it gives you the ability to connect with people you'd never dream of before but omg, it is stressful keeping up with all of the great stuff out there. I'm glad I am not the only one who feels like throwing her laptop out the window sometimes…

    Nailah

  • desiredomo

    I think this is my favorite post you've ever written. Thank you for writing it and sharing it with all of us… It really turned my day around :)

    Lots and lots of love,
    Me

  • http://thepalatepeacemaker.com Desiree Domo

    I think this is my favorite post you've ever written. Thank you for writing it and sharing it with all of us… It really turned my day around :)

    Lots and lots of love,
    Me

  • http://twitter.com/marianschembari/status/13564130207 Marian Schembari

    I LOVE my blog readers soo much. Thanks for the supportive comments on my latest post: The Internet Is Stressing Me Out http://bit.ly/9Hoowv

  • http://www.jendawn13.com/ Jenny

    I know I'm just some random internet stranger who got linked to your site, but I did want to comment and say a few things… 1) I don't see any incompetence or disorganization in this post, I see ambition and motivation. I only wish that *I* had the energy that you seem to. 2) As I've told Josh, I think it's GREAT when bloggers include more personal posts like this, so us readers can see a bit of “behind the scenes” and get to see another side of the writer. 3) Hang in there! You've got a lot on your plate right now, but hopefully you can still squeeze in a lot of fun in your upcoming trip. :-)

  • http://talkingshrimp.com/blog/ Laura Belgray

    Oh god, have I gone through that. When I first discovered Planet Entrepreneur (a concept, not a website, don't try to go there), I was up till 3 every morning. Husband: “You coming to bed? Ever? What's going on with you?” Me: “I'm networking. I'm doing this for us!”
    So many websites. Blogs. Downloadable courses. That cost money. I got so addicted to info products. It's research!

    Eventually, you'll hit a wall where you realize most people are just repeating each other – and themselves. You'll figure out who's awesome and who's just aping awesomeness. It'll get narrowed down to just a few things/ people you're even at all interested in, because at some point, you've heard just about all of it.

    I mean, for starters: how many times have you already seen the word “authentic”? Am I right?

    Don't worry, it'll get a lot smaller and less overwhelming pretty soon.

    xoLaura

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    Jenny, I LOVE new visitors. Thanks so much for commenting!

    I'm equally happy that I don't come off as incompetent. I totally stressed this morning that posting this was a mistake, but so far the responses have been positive and what's the fun of having a blog if I can't force you guys to make me feel better about my life? ;-)

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    Aww, thanks Muffin! I love you <3

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    Haha! Well I'm happy my pain amuses you!!

    In all serious though, I think deep down that's why I wrote this post. It's nice to have people to relate to.

  • http://twitter.com/stacy_boyd/status/13605545416 Stacy Boyd

    "finally on the right path…but fuck if it’s not stressful" @marianschembari http://bit.ly/bLKSH8 // I feel your pain…and bliss

  • http://talkingshrimp.com/blog/ Laura Belgray

    I think the answer to shutting down your mind at bedtime is in London.
    Me, I had to just burn out on all this stuff before I could stop grinding my teeth all night. Trust me, your business will evolve without you knowing every what's what and who's who. The more you get into that shit, the more you get the false impression that everyone already knows everything, and you don't have anything new to share. You forget that the rest of the world doesn't spend their time reading blogs about blogs and tweets about twitter.

    I like to remind myself (and others in this situation) that most people out there don't masturbate to a picture of Seth Godin.

    So keep that in mind! And don't think you have to be so immersed in that scene. The key to your success is reaching all the people who know nothing and want to learn, not all the people who are already in Club Supernerd.

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    Get out of my head, Belgray. I was totally going to Google “Planet Entrepreneur”. That aside, I agree with what you say about people repeating each other… it's very frustrating.

    LOL Authentic. Totally. And “engaging.” That's up there with blogging about blogging. All 3 of which I'm guilt of.

    I hope it does get smaller soon because I feel like a thousand thoughts are rattling around in my head. I know that I need to prioritize and take it one step at a time. It's just all… IN MY FACE all the time and I have a hard time shutting off.

    Yesterday I went to the library and checked out a couple children's lit books. Figured it might help to stop reading business books before bed and start reading something a little easier and more entertaining. Something that doesn't make me think…. ooooh. I should blog about that. Anyway, tips are always appreciated in terms of shutting down my mind :)

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    Oooohh…. snap! Nice one ;-)

    And seriously? You are one smart cookie. I'm pretty much in love with everything you say.

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    God, it's so nice to know I'm not the only one! Thanks for making me feel better!

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    I'm mostly finished with Trust Agents and I highly recommend it. I heart Chris Brogan a lot and the book is all about, well, trust. But along with explaining how trust online works it gives some actionable tasks to create your presence into something people actually buy. Which is probably why I've been stressing out so much – I feel like there's 50,000 things I'm still not doing yet to be a “trust agent.” Regardless, it's definitely worth a read!

  • http://twitter.com/michaelellsberg/status/13642993070 Michael Ellsberg

    Can anyone else relate? RT @marianschembari: The Internet Is Stressing Me Out http://bit.ly/9Hoowv

  • http://talkingshrimp.com/blog/ LBelgray

    I think the answer to shutting down your mind at bedtime is in London.
    Me, I had to just burn out on all this stuff before I could stop grinding my teeth all night. Trust me, your business will evolve without you knowing every what's what and who's who. The more you get into that shit, the more you get the false impression that everyone already knows everything, and you don't have anything new to share. You forget that the rest of the world doesn't spend their time reading blogs about blogs and tweets about twitter.

    I like to remind myself (and others in this situation) that most people out there don't masturbate to a picture of Seth Godin.

    So keep that in mind! And don't think you have to be so immersed in that scene. The key to your success is reaching all the people who know nothing and want to learn, not all the people who are already in Club Supernerd.

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    Get out of my head, Belgray. I was totally going to Google “Planet Entrepreneur”. That aside, I agree with what you say about people repeating each other… it's very frustrating.

    LOL Authentic. Totally. And “engaging.” That's up there with blogging about blogging. All 3 of which I'm guilt of.

    I hope it does get smaller soon because I feel like a thousand thoughts are rattling around in my head. I know that I need to prioritize and take it one step at a time. It's just all… IN MY FACE all the time and I have a hard time shutting off.

    Yesterday I went to the library and checked out a couple children's lit books. Figured it might help to stop reading business books before bed and start reading something a little easier and more entertaining. Something that doesn't make me think…. ooooh. I should blog about that. Anyway, tips are always appreciated in terms of shutting down my mind :)

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    Oooohh…. snap! Nice one ;-)

    And seriously? You are one smart cookie. I'm pretty much in love with everything you say.

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    God, it's so nice to know I'm not the only one! Thanks for making me feel better!

  • http://marianlibrarian.com Marian Schembari

    I'm mostly finished with Trust Agents and I highly recommend it. I heart Chris Brogan a lot and the book is all about, well, trust. But along with explaining how trust online works it gives some actionable tasks to create your presence into something people actually buy. Which is probably why I've been stressing out so much – I feel like there's 50,000 things I'm still not doing yet to be a “trust agent.” Regardless, it's definitely worth a read!

  • Pingback: I’m relieving my stress by reading children’s books | Marian Schembari

  • http://twitter.com/debbiestier/status/13907002981 debbiestier

    I call it "the lock" RT @michaelellsberg Can anyone else relate? RT @marianschembari: The Internet Is Stressing Me Out http://bit.ly/9Hoowv

  • cake-like

    Hhe article’s content rich variety which make us move for our mood after reading this article. surprise, here you will find what you want! Recently, I found some wedsites which commodity is colorful of fashion. Such as xxxxxxxx that worth you to see. Believe me these websites won’t let you down. http://www.Most-modern.net

  • Pingback: Book Blowout Contest! I can’t take it all with me… | Marian Schembari

  • Pingback: Some Lessons I Will Never Learn | Marian Schembari

  • http://twitter.com/julianowebpages Bret Juliano

    Somehow I stumbled upon your site, not sure how, but I can totally agree with this post. I do the same thing, too many nights to count.

Previous post:

Next post: