First time here? Read this post to get caught up on this month’s truth or dare launch party and why both truthing and daring is so powerful.
Truth or Dare Week 2
Dare: What are you embarrassed someone will find on your phone?
You know that thing. You hand someone your phone to admire a photo and you’re terrified they’ll ___________ (scroll to that photo, see your “private” folder or accidentally click on your Justin Bieber Spotify playlist).
Got it in your head?
Take a screenshot of that embarrassing app/photo/song and share it in the comments (or just tell me if it’s NSFW).
A few days before Elliot and I got married, he presented me with a wedding gift.
Specifically, a red Miata named Dixie who I would later drive to work across the Golden Gate Bridge with the top down.
He got Star Wars cufflinks.
Post-wedding, in an attempt to make it up to him for my significantly less awesome wedding gift, I got sexy photos taken, which now live on my phone in a “hidden” folder that is absolutely not hidden at all.
However, these are not what I’m most embarrassed someone will find. In fact, I am so in love with these photos I hope someone stumbles across them. For the first time in my adult life I felt unapologetically gorgeous and sexy. I texted the final shoots to all my friends, boobs be damned.
I’m embarrassed for you to find….
Give me a minute.
It’s Hay Day, okay? HAY DAY. The farming game.
I am obsessive about Hay Day. I spend hours harvesting fake wheat and feeding fake chickens and baking fake bread. But I’m so embarrassed about this obsession that I refuse to connect my account to Facebook because what if a friend sees I play? Or worse, how often I check in during a given day?
I am so embarrassed that when my husband glances over at me I immediately flip my phone vertically (the game is played horizontally) so he’ll think I’m doing something normal like scrolling mindlessly through Instagram.
I realize plenty of people play online games (and at least I’m not throwing money into poker), I am horrified to be That Person. As a kid we weren’t allowed to watch TV and I was so proud of this fact I wrote about my college essay about all the other things I do with my time – write songs, read, volunteer.
I’m embarrassed because I know exactly how much time I waste, giving me no legal right to complain about my lack of German skills or my barely-started novel.
Here’s my excuse: I don’t have the energy to “be productive” all the damn time. So if my downtime involves farming computerized animals, so be it. Sure, I could go for a walk or read or journal or meditate, but honestly? Those all feel like more shit on my to-do list.
Truth: What’s your scariest recurring dream?
I have two.
The first is that my husband turns into my high school boyfriend. They physically become the same person and Elliot starts acting different and it’s like I never knew him at all. I have some version of this dream about once a month and it’s heartbreaking. You can read more about that story here.
The second recurring nightmare is one I’ve been having for the past 20 years. The dream? The lights won’t turn on.
Stay with me here.
I come home at night and try to turn on the foyer light because I can’t see. Nothing happens. I flick the switch over and over and it doesn’t work. I call out, but no one’s home. I feel my way up the stairs but that light won’t turn on either. I walk into my room, flick the switch, nothing happens.
Throughout the dream I get more and more terrified until finally I figure out a way to force myself awake and immediately try to turn on my bedside lamp.
Sure, it may not sound terrifying, but it’s the scariest dream I have. I don’t just feel home alone in the dark, but alone in the world.
Now you know my deepest shame. Your turn. Share a photo of something embarrassing on your phone or tell us about your recurring nightmare. Go!