4 Books I Read in December

by Marian Schembari on January 10, 2012

It’s that time of the month again!

Hmm… perhaps different wording is in order?

Regardless, here are the books I read in December:

Warm Bodies by Isaac Marion

I started this book last month and fell head over heels in love. The story of zombies, never mind a zombie “filled with love” is not my usual reading material, but I couldn’t put this book down. I found myself underlining passages in every chapter and staring in awe at the author’s mad writing skills. HOWEVER. Because I need something to complain about (and I do have one complaint), the first half of the book was significantly better than the second. The first half was witty and moving without being cheesy and overly sentimental. The story was super tight and obviously well-crafted. The second half, however, was slightly over the top and I lost the plot at a few points. I’d still recommend Warm Bodies though as it was a complete treat to read.

Watermelon by Marian Keyes

I was obsessed with Marian Keyes as a teenager and after reading something quite heavy, I like to mix it up with chic lit or a YA novel. While the number of times I’ve read Watermelon is already in the double digits, I didn’t love this story any less this time around.

I followed up Watermelon with another chic lit book by a new author. But this particular book was so bad, so poorly written, with characters so utterly and completely disgusting, I refuse to tell you the name of it as I hope this book dies a slow and painful death. Let’s just say I thought the story of a Connecticut girl moving to London would be JUST UP MY ALLEY SEEING AS IT’S ACTUALLY MY LIFE, but instead it was filled with gratuitous shopping, loud Americans an anonymous sex. Because, you know, that’s exactly what all 20-something American girls do.

Blue Nights by Joan Didion

I recently joined an Auckland book club and this was our first book. I ended up missing the meeting due to torrential rain and a lack of car and I’m still bummed I didn’t get a chance to hear what everyone else thought about Blue Nights. I’d never read Joan Didion before so wasn’t sure what to expect.

I couldn’t finish it. Holysweetjesus does this woman name drop. And explain in flowery prose what could be said in two words. The book was supposed to be about the death of her daughter but not only do you get no indication of how her daughter dies, but it’s impossible to understand who she was. Didion spent more time talking about some hot shot she wrote a script with than the kind of person her daughter was. Every time she talks about some life event in her family she say something like, “In a few [pictures] she is wearing a cashmere turtleneck sweater I brought her from London when we went that May to do promotion for the European release of The Panic in Needle Park.”

This line is everything that’s wrong with Blue Nights. She talks more about her daughter’s clothes than her personality. She talks more about her own successes than stories about her daughter.  And, finally, this sentence has to be the shortest in the book. Stay as far away from Blue Nights as you possibly can.

Little Bee by Chris Cleave

Loved this book. I had no idea what to expect when going in as Amazon was sort of ambiguous on the details, but it’s essentially the story between a Nigerian refugee and a well-to-do(ish) British woman. The book revolves around the tragedy which prompts their meeting and how this refugee, Little Bee, gets her ass over to the UK and survives two years in a detention center. And, wait for it, the detention center where she was held? Loosely based on Yarl’s Wood. Yeah, that would be the center where I was held back in 2010. Since I was only there for two days I experienced none of Little Bee’s story, but something about her description of the facility and the author’s notes at the end got me all choked up.

I loved Little Bee’s character. I loved all the characters, actually. Including a 6 year old who refuses to dress up in anything other than a Batman costume. That said, the author was “flowery” and I freaking hate flowery writing. I mean, I appreciate beautiful prose. Good writing. But telling me, “She was whispering into it in some language that sounded like butterflies drowning in honey” is not actually helpful. Have you ever heard a butterfly drowning in honey? Didn’t think so. But still, Cleave came up with more brilliant lines than ridiculous ones, my favorite being, “When you are a refugee you learn to pay attention to doors. When they are open; when they are closed; the particular sound they make…”

This month I also tried reading The Tiger’s Wife as there’s been a huge amount of talk around it, but I just couldn’t get into it. Every few pages I’d think, “What did I just read?” and have to go back and have another look. So I stopped after a few chapters and have picked up The Art of Fielding which I’m really enjoying so far.

My book club choice for this month is The Night Circus. Anyone read it? What did you read last month? Any recommendations?

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The Great New Zealand Road Trip

by Marian Schembari on January 9, 2012

The brilliant thing about New Zealand is that around Christmas, everything shuts down. The majority of offices close for around two weeks, meaning I had a hugely long holiday and nothing to do.

Enter standbycars.com. I’ve been on their database since Australia but the timing had never been right. They’re a company that hooks you up with campervans that need “relocating”. In New Zealand, most people pick up vans in Auckland and drive them down south. But someone needs to drive them back up again!

Enter me.

For a grand total of $25 I was able to rent a campervan for four days and drive it back to Auckland from Christchurch.

And I can honestly say, without exaggeration, it’s the best thing I’ve ever done in my life.

The Road Trip

On January 1st I flew down to Christchurch to spend a few days being a tourist. I figured there must be a few things open since the quake. Not so much. But my roommate Alana hooked me up with a friend who let me crash at his place and was the best tour guide a girl could ask for.

We went to the zoo, the botanical gardens, watched bestmovieofalltime Anchorman, toured the abandoned CBD and, like a true tourist, experienced not one, not two, but THREE earthquakes. It was pretty terrifying to wake up at 1am to your entire world shaking, but we were safe on our side of town and (please don’t hate me), there was a little bit of a rush from experiencing such absolute power of nature.

I imagine Christchurch was quite a beautiful city before the earthquakes. Tons of greenery and old buildings and English activities like punting, all which make my heart flutter.

So seeing central Christchurch in ruins was an eye-opener. I’ve been to ghost towns before in Middle America, but to see what was such a vibrant city only a year ago completely shut down, boarded up and with weeds growing through the roads was very apocalyptic. Very end of days.

But still, locals kept a sense of humor about the situation, which is one of the things I love most about New Zealand. Like this port-a-loo decorated for New Year on a damaged residential street.

After two days in Chch I was chauffeured to the campervan pick up location to start my next big adventure. I had four days to get the van (who I christened “Jill”) to Auckland. It’s around 1200km and sixteen hours of driving.

After asking every Kiwi I know where to go and what to do, I settled on hiking in Hanmer Springs, whale watching in Kaikoura, being cultural in Nelson, catching the ferry in Picton, eating good food in Wellington and walking the lake in Taupo.

It was the driving I enjoyed most. New Zealand’s terrain is so incredibly diverse and I saw everything from fields of lavender to snow-capped mountains to vineyards to volcanic landscapes. I kept pulling the car over every hundred miles just to stare in awe. At one point I actually started laughing to myself because I couldn’t fully believe how beautiful it was.

It went from this….

To this….

To this…

To this…

I mean, COME ON. These are real places! Like, IN THE WORLD.

I have never in my life felt so lucky. I mean, not only did I get to see all this beauty, but I get to live here. And I made myself a promise that from now on I need to make more of an effort to explore outside Auckland. This country is incredible. How exactly did it take me 13 months to realize this?

Me, Myself & I

In those four days I was entirely alone, talking only to waiters and the people behind the desk at holiday parks. I did start talking to myself around day three but that’s another thing I learned during those four days: I am awesome company.

I’ve always loved being alone. I need Marian Time every day and I travel solo more frequently than with company. But never have I been SO alone. No couchsurfing, no hostels, no tourist attractions. Just me, the road and the Dixie Chicks on repeat.

And I loved it. More than I’ve loved anything. I loved that I could see a beautiful river on the side of the road, park the car and dive in. I loved that I was originally going to head to Napier but changed course at a fork in the road to instead drive through Tongariro National Park. I loved that when Jill had car issues I handled it. And when before I’d never understood how a campervan actually worked, I was suddenly plugging in to power sites and emptying water tanks in style.

Basically, call your friendly local campervan company and see if they need anything relocated. Or just come to New Zealand. Or spend tomorrow entirely alone. Whatever works for you. But I gotta say, this trip? Totally did it for me.

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Happy 2012! Let’s Celebrate a Year in Pictures

by Marian Schembari on December 30, 2011

I fear I’m beginning to get to the age where time constantly feels like it’s flying. How have I been living in New Zealand for over a year? How is it possible I graduated college two years ago? Can someone remind me how exactly my five-year high school reunion has not only come, but completely gone? It’s overwhelming.

That said, this year hasn’t been exactly been – how shall we say – uneventful. Let’s take a look back, shall we?

January

Beach! Sun! New Zealand Summer! New website design. New clients. Decided I might want a “real” job.

Top post: 8 Sentences to Immediately Cut from Your Twitter Bio

February

New friends. Interviewed on national TV. Coworking spaces. Job interviews. American Meetup group. Apparently New Zealand has a basketball team. Oh, and earthquake.

Top post: 6 Website “Tricks” Readers Hate

March

Ohgodnomoreinterviewsplease. Old roomie moves over from London. Pasifika Festival. Find out Kiwis put ice cream in iced coffee. It’s delicious.

Top post: How to Leave the Best Comment in the History of the Web

April

Move into my first house on a street called Cardigan. We host a high tea. I visit an American store in Bumblefuck, Auckland and stock up on Easy Mac and canned pumpkin.

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May

Work part time at a cupcake shop. Definitely top 5 jobs I’ve ever had. Turn 24. Land a “real” job. It’s awesome. Definitely in the top 5…

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June

Mom visits New Zealand! Visit Wellington. Sing the National Anthem (the US one, that is) in front of lots of Kiwis.

Top post: 5 Creative Uses for Facebook Photo Albums

July

Experience the most beautiful beach in all the world. Mini north of the North Island road trip. Worst flu of my life.

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August

Major escape (aka “meltdown”). Leave Auckland. Backpack and couchsurf solo through Australia.

Top post: So I write like I talk. Sue me.

September

More travel. More couchsurfing. Plant trees in Queenstown with some hippies.

Top post: 7 Things Travel is Teaching Me

October

Return to Auckland. Find a new house, new friends, new life. Rugby World Cup! Listen to Back in Black 53 million times.

Top post: 32 Ways to Tweak Your Blog This Afternoon

November

Go rollerskating for first time. Explore Waiheke. Drink wine. Hike. Big Fat American Thanksgiving. Move house (again). This time get it right. Lots and lots of yoga.

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December

Windsurfing! Summer in New Zealand! Not so much sun but we’re just gonna go with it! Christmas. 2 weeks holiday. Road trip starting January 1, 2012…

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Phew! Holy monkey. You HAVE to do this exercise. Just go through your year, your photographs, your blog and look at how freaking much you accomplished. I’m actually pretty impressed with myself. And finally starting to look forward to what 2012 will bring.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

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If you blog, read this. P.S. Jones has rocked it again in this latest guest post that’s all about getting your shit together and protecting your work.

The other day, I was talking to a friend via Gchat about some changes she was making on her website. Suddenly, her IMs were filled with curse words and I thought she was having a seizure or something. Nope. Turns out updating her plugins broke her site. “Where’s your backup file?” I asked her but I already knew the answer.

She didn’t have one.

Now, I know my friend knows she’s supposed to back up her websites. She isn’t new to working online. She’s not new to WordPress, either. She’s a very intelligent woman whose opinion I trust and whose work ethic I admire. I know for a fact, she’s read the 6 bajillion posts and articles out there that say “Hey, you need to back up stuff.” I know for a fact she and I have talked about a plugin I use that backs up my sites automatically, sending me an email of the database files.

But she hadn’t backed it up.

3 Bullshit Reasons You Think This Won’t Happen to You

I think the reason well meaning, intelligent people don’t back their stuff up boils down to three main mistaken beliefs:

  • You think you’re too small to attract any Internet vandals.
  • You think it happens to people with enemies.
  • You think that you only have safe stuff installed on your site.

The title of this post is actually what I said to that friend when she confessed she didn’t have any backups of her website. (I wasn’t actually telling her to watch out for Chinese kids.) I was referring to the fact that there are eight year olds that can hack a website. And often it’s someone you’ve never met, from somewhere you’ve never been, who has no reason to mess with you other than he or she wants to. It might just be the luck of the draw with some plugin or code you put there yourself. Even if everything’s working fine today, an update can easily make it all go to hell. No matter what the reason, the odds are good that one day, your site’s gonna be broken and you’re gonna say “Hey, I should have backed this up” as you roll around on the floor crying.

And it always happens at the worst time possible. While you’re on vacation. When you’re sick. When you have no Internet access or anyone to help you fix it. Basically, if you’re short on time or resources, that’s when it hits you.

Reasons Not to Back Up

There are only two real reasons you don’t need to back up your website:

  • You don’t care about the work you’ve put into building your site.
  • You have infinite time and money to fix anything that may happen.

If this applies to you, then by all means go ahead and let whatever happens happen. If not, back it up. No, not like you’re in a club. Don’t do the cabbage patch and drop it like it’s hot. Instead, spend a few minutes to save yourself time and money in the long run. Either schedule a maintenance day to handle your backups or get a plugin that does it automatically.

What are you using to make yourself less vulnerable to a website snafu? What backup tools do you recommend?

Princess Jones is the evil genius behind P.S. Jones Communications, where she helps small businesses, solopreneurs and freelancers focus on the big picture in their communication efforts. She’s also the managing editor of She’s Self-Employed, a website devoted to women who write their own checks. For more conversation on websites, backups and dropping it like it’s hot, follow her on Twitter.

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A Very Kiwi Christmas: 2011 Edition

by Marian Schembari on December 26, 2011

The fact that this was my second warm-weather New Zealand Christmas is a thought that continues to baffle me. And it doesn’t help that for months I’d been stressed about spending the holiday alone. But thanksbetobabyjesus, my amazing new roommate, Alana, saved the day by inviting me to her family’s house to celebrate.

And they were wonderful. Loud and boisterous and welcoming – just like my own family!

We set out the Kiwi version of milk and cookies on Christmas Eve (in NZ it’s beer and mince pies – go figure).

On Christmas morning I went to church and, well, it’s been a looonnng time since I’ve gone to church willingly. And my have they digitized the experience! During the children’s time they actually played a DVD of this adorable little nativity story. You have to watch it. It’s like the guys who made Where the Wild Things Are had a crack at Jesus:

Then we opened presents! I had forgotten how awesome Christmas is with children and it was so nice to have Alana’s niece, Michelle, there to be all excited about her doll house and new swimsuit (or “togs” as they call them).

While I’m still getting used to barbequing during December, Christmas crackers and spending such a family-oriented holiday with other people’s relatives, it definitely was a Christmas to remember. There’s nothing better than new people and being a fly on the wall for others’ traditions.

I hope your day was as special, magical and filled with love as mine turned out to be. MERRY HOLIDAYS TO ALL!

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