6 Obnoxious Questions You Should Never Ask a Blogger

by Marian Schembari on March 12, 2012

While every blogger worth his or her salt is grateful for their readers every damn day (it’s what makes the blogging world go round), there are a handful of questions you get asked so often that you get suddenly and dangerously stabby. Questions that give you the burning and all-encompassing desire to break the internet.

These are those questions.

Please. Don’t be that person.

I think your readers would be interested in…

No, I don’t think they would be interested in that infographic you made in Microsoft Paint about the top 10 online universities in Northern Iowa.

Have you ever written a post about…?

It’s called a search box. Learn how to use it.

Can you please write me a 12 page email about how exactly you started your blog, got readers and give me a step-by-step plan to get people reading my blog? I’m going to read it, not respond or say thank you and then make sure to never take your advice.

If I had a fucking nickle for the number of emails I get that include some version of this I could yacht my way to Fiji. If I had another nickle for every time I responded anyway, expecting some sort of different outcome, well, the movie Titanic might never have been made

You should change your blog header/tagline/URL/posting frequency/Twitter handle/name/social security number. I don’t like it because x, y and z reason that has everything to do with one personal experience I had that applies to every single one of your readers.

You should try running a blog that pleases everyone. And no, I’ve never heard that specific piece of advice before. Thanks for the hugely insightful brilliance that comes out of your digital mouth.

I have a blog too! It’s about my cat. We should link to each other!

No. No we shouldn’t.

Hey, you blog! I read this article on Mashable I figured you’d never read before and thought you’d like it. I don’t know if you know this, but RSS feeds are the next big thing.

Honest question: Do you think people who send really, really, really obvious links through on a regular basis are trying to help or show off that they know what Mashable is?

 

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How to make your job hunt so easy, you don’t even have to think about it

by Marian Schembari on March 7, 2012

This is a guest post from Emma Cunningham, who knows how much I love a good social media success story. Read below for the ins and outs of how she landed not one, but two great roles using online networking. Booyah!

I knew I wanted to work in digital publishing within days of starting my post-grad certificate in publishing. I love the rapid pace, the constant feel of “shiny and new”, and the small-world atmosphere.

My goal was a job at romance publisher Harlequin, so I followed their Twitter feed, as well as the personal feeds of some of their digital employees. I did a little freelance work for them. After graduation, I chatted up the assistant manager of digital content and social media, Amy Wilkins. Our coffee date was supposed to be a chance for me to pick her brain, but it turned into a recommendation for a six-month contract as a Production Coordinator on their digital content team.

Around the five-month mark, my contract was renewed for another seven months. Shortly after the extension offer, I got pregnant. I knew I wanted to stay home with my baby until she starts school, so I planned on seeking out freelance work once I finished my year of maternity leave.

I decided to ask for LinkedIn recommendations before my last day to make sure people had my work fresh in their minds. A lot of people use LinkedIn to post their resumes, but many are nervous about asking for recommendations. They don’t want to impose on their colleagues or call in favours. I can tell you, though, from personal experience, that making that request was one of the smartest career moves I’ve ever made.

Within moments of asking Croco Designs’ Creative Director Frauke Spanuth – who does cover art for some of Harlequin’s digital imprints and websites for several of their authors – she wrote back asking if I wanted a remote position with flexible hours as the Content and Social Media Manager at Croco Designs.

Frauke was looking for a native English speaker who was familiar with the romance and genre fiction markets, and had digital PR experience. She’d communicated with me enough via e-mail to have a sense that I could be a good fit personality-wise, and she’d seen my various social media platforms which gave her an idea of my areas of expertise and skillset.

“I didn’t even have to think about my job hunt”

I didn’t even have to think about going on a job hunt. The offer came months before I even went on maternity leave. All it took was a strong online presence and the guts to ask for that LinkedIn referral. Now I work with authors to keep the copy on their websites fresh, entertaining, and search-engine friendly. I also help them build up their Twitter, Facebook and blogging skills. Best of all, I get to work with NYT bestselling authors, fresh new debut authors, and everyone in between—all from my laptop in the living room. Getting a job this perfect was almost too easy.

Networking has always been the best way to score your dream job. All that’s changed is that it’s now a hundred times easier to schmooze with your future boss.

Emma Cunningham is an ebook geek, digital marketer and publicist, and avid reader. She currently acts as the Content & Social Media Manager for Croco Designs, helping authors develop their online content for maximum impact. Her blog helps authors navigate the complex worlds of publishing and platforms.

Note from Marian: Do you have a cool story about how social media saved your bacon? Shoot me an email by clicking here and tell me all about it. I’d love to feature you on the blog.

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What Actually Happens When a Celebrity Retweets You

by Marian Schembari on February 23, 2012

Okay. Whew! That was interesting.

Let’s just jump right into it, shall we?

First, this happened: I wrote a post about Stephen Fry and the broadband issues in New Zealand.

Then, this happened: Stephen Fry saw the post, READ IT (God bless that beautiful man) and retweeted it out to his followers. (Then had the gentlemenly quality to thank me.)

Because of that, this happened:

Yes. You read that correctly. That would be over 70,000 clicks in 24 hours.

But because that happened, this happened:

Gotta love, Bluehost, huh?

I almost started hyperventilating. Every blogger dreams of getting their writing found – to have something go at least a little viral. Well, not only did things NOT go as planned (hellllo Database Error!) but I had no idea this would be the post that finally “made it”. I wrote it on a whim at midnight because I was so infuriated by New Zealand’s reaction to Fry’s tweets about our broadband. It wasn’t – how shall we say – the nicest, most non-stereotypically American post I’ve ever written.

Thankfully, reader response was surprisingly positive. I was impressed at the lack of trolls and angry Kiwis. It was pretty awesome seeing so many people agree with what I thought was a privileged-American-girl (or British celebrity) problem.

An since most of you regular readers are also bloggers, I thought I’d take you through a tour of this blog’s undercarriage so you can see exactly what goes down when something so stunning happens.

Exactly What Happens When an Actor with 4 Million Twitter Followers Shares Your Post

Number one: Clicks. Obviously. Lots of them. As of right now there are 295 retweets and counting. The majority of clicks obviously came from Fry’s 4 million followers, and this totaled to around 70,000 clicks on the first day.

Number two: Traffic. Unfortunately, my site crashed (or, as the internets like to call it, my site got “Fryed”). My host was in no way prepared for the influx of traffic and my site continues to have issues and keeps crashing on me. On the first day I received 13,238 visitors. The second day, 15,497. See below for a screenshot of my Analytics. The 300-700 views per day I was getting before? Insignificant compared to what Fry did in seconds.

Number three: Revenue. (Sort of.) I made a whopping $18.06 from Adsense during the past two days. For someone who averages out around $0.20 on a good day, $18 is pretty damn impressive. Now what shall I spend it on…?

Number four: Subscribers. Even with tens of thousands of new visitors, my subscribers only went up by 31. Because people tend to subscribe only when they’ve been to a blog a few times, I’m not hugely surprised, but it’s definitely an interesting non-development.

Number five: Twitter followers. I received 127 new followers in the past two days. It usually takes about 1-2 weeks for me to accumulate that much “organically”.

Number six: Klout. My score went up by eleven points after Fry shared the post.

What They Don’t Tell You

It’s been pretty cool to see all my traffic and stats go up. HOWEVER. The bounce rate on my site is now beyond high. time spent has decreased by over a minute so it’s now it’s at an average (average!) of 30 seconds. Clearly I’m not immediately impressing people with my charm and dashing good looks.

Basically, it was a nice bump in traffic that’s done wonders for my ego, but the lesson here is that just because you get mentioned by an “a-lister” (or Stephen-fucking-Fry in this case) doesn’t mean it will help your site long term.

There’s no real moral to this story other than: here’s a look into what really happens when someone awesome links to you. Pretty interesting, huh?

p.s. Mr Stephen Fry, you’re my new hero. A hat tip to you, kind sir.

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Fry Trashes New Zealand Broadband. Schembari Says ‘HELL YEAH’.

by Marian Schembari on February 20, 2012

Ever since arriving in New Zealand I’ve been developing this chip on my shoulder about the internet. When I first arrived I had been freelancing, which meant spending a lot of time out of the house working at coffee shops and libraries.

Not in New Zealand.

I quickly discovered coffee shops here don’t have free wifi, but the general internet is total crap. Not only slow, but expensive. And dysfunctional anywhere outside cities. And, oh, wait, LIMITED.

What is limited internet?

At the risk of sounding like a first-world whiner (which, let’s face it, the majority of this post is going to be just that), I had no idea what limited broadband meant until moving here.

Essentially it means you can only pay for and use a certain amount of data. Activities like checking email don’t eat much. Updating software, using Skype, watching YouTube videos, uploading photos…. those do.

In New Zealand, that data costs a lot. For $200/month living with five people we received 20GB of data each. In New York, my roommate and I paid $22 total for unlimited internet. You do the math.

Broadband Issues Bad for New Zealand’s Economy

I’m currently working for a start-up in a young industry. I meet a lot of professionals and entrepreneurs who are invested in New Zealand’s growth as part of the global economy. Over the past year I’ve been to many conferences on that very topic – a major event at the University of Auckland Business School, a digital conference run by MSN, a program hosted by Google…

Want to know what all these events had in common?

None of them had wifi.

Someone please explain how you can attend a conference for digital professionals about the growth of New Zealand’s international economy AND NOT HAVE THE FUCKING INTERNET.

But wait! It gets better…

Enter: Stephen Fry

Stephen Fry, master of all that is humorous and national treasure of England, is in New Zealand. And I was giddy with joy when my 15-month-long annoyances were justified when I saw this tweet:

The full story is, apparently, Fry was doing lots of “high-bandwidth activities” like uploading photos/videos. He went over the limit and Telecom slowed his speed to dial-up, which is what happens here if you exceed your limit.

(As someone who does this every month, I can assure you it’s quite the treat.)

What shocked me though were the tweets following Fry’s rant. New Zealanders are a defensive bunch and even if everyone here hates the limits, there was no way in hell they would allow an outsider to insult their country.

One guy tweeted that, well, “maybe internet is slow here but at least it stops people from tweeting too much” (!). Another called Fry an asshole. And, of course, many brought out The Earthquake Card, saying Kiwis who have internet “should be thankful for what they have.”

NZ publications and even the damn government is responding to this issue all wrong. They’re responding as if Fry has had an out-of-the-ordinary experience. I can assure you, he hasn’t. Fry’s issue is representative of a bigger problem in New Zealand.

Dear NZ, You’re 10 Years Behind. Again.

Fry later posted a series of tweets that have made me fall in love with him even more. He said (edited for clarity), “Comcast-style throttling is disastrous for the economy. For visitors and for everyone. It won’t stop illegal torrenting and makes as much sense as closing a lane of traffic because there’s congestion. Yes, Kiwi Land is remote, but if Avatar can be made here and they want to keep its reputation for being the loveable, easy-going, outdoorsy yet tech savvy place it is, then pressure @telecomNZ into offering better packages. Kiwis travel. They know 20MB is routine in Europe and the UK is rolling out ultra fast fibre-optic. Come on, New Zealand, you’re world champions at rugby and film-making. Pressure the providers to stop being a digital embarrassment.”

This has nothing to do with Fry going over the data cap. Or choosing the wrong provider. There is no other provider. There are no real competitors to Telecom. It’s called a monopoly. And it’s not okay.

And, to clarify, most first world countries don’t have data caps. As per usual, New Zealand is about ten years behind. In the words of one commenter, its policies are “primitive.” One traveler even said that as much as he loved it here, the broadband limitations means he “could never work or live here permanently.”

So BRAVO, Stephen Fry. B-R-A-V-O.

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Stop Ruining Pinterest for Everyone Who Loves It

by Marian Schembari on February 14, 2012

You know that obnoxious habit when you mention something new to a friend and they respond with “yeah, I heard about that ages ago” and you want to punch them in the mouth for being such a know-it-all? Well, everyone who’s been using Pinterest is starting to feel that way (re: we are the annoying know-it-all) now all the big marketing blogs are talking about it like they’ve discovered the Americas. (p.s. I’m not going to explain what Pinterest is. Go here if you want the details.)

Even though I work in marketing, I’m getting increasing frustrated at the industry’s new perspective of Pintrest…

  • Like this article that tells us “everything we need to know” but only actually tells us how to pimp your content to increase traffic.
  • Or this TechCrunch post that says Pinterest hasn’t yet reached its full potential because the audience is mostly women. (I wish I were kidding.)

And I’m not the only one. Pinterest lovers are annoyed because they’re all addicts. We’re all addicts. And I’m getting increasingly worried about sponsored pins, spam and generic crap being regurgitated into the webisphere.

That said, a) there’s nothing you nor I can do about it and b) there is opportunity because Pintrest is the best thing to happen to the internet since The Evolution of Dance. So I’m hoping with this post I can help the world use Pintrest for good instead of evil.

Here are some examples of companies on Pinterest, including what they do perfectly and who could use some work:

Modcloth

If Modcloth were a woman these boards would be everything she’d pin, making it as personal and personable as possible. It’s easily the best example of a brand on Pinterest.

Favorite Board: Behind the Stylebooks

Everyone loves a little behind-the-scenes, but Modcloth stands apart by showing what inspired their stylebooks, including typography, copy and vintage advertisements.

HGTV

A SparkNotes version of their website with awesome projects, design and food inspiration. While I’d usually consider this much HGTV content spammy, skimming through their projects in Pinterest-format is easier to digest.

Favorite Board: Mint Green: Color of the Month

This board gives you design ideas they might never have thought of under the umbrella of creative color.

The Travel Channel

What’s more inspirational than travel photos? The Travel Channel have organized their boards into different locations, with a few behind-the-scenes from their shows.

Favorite Board: Travel Finds

Travel Finds is a mash-up of inspirational travel quotes and nifty gadgets. It’s not too refined or particularly extensive, but that’s what I like about it.

Serious Eats

While the Serious Eats account is filled with gorgeous photos and dish ideas, they could do an even better job if they created other food-related boards like kitchen gadgets, restaurants, reviews and products they love.

Favorite Board: Booze-free drinks

Serious Eats organizes their boards  just like a cookbook! They have boards like Pasta and Noodles, Mexican, and Cocktails, as well as boards for events like Valentine’s Day and St. Patrick’s.

Kikki.k

Again, too product heavy, but stationery company Kikki.k does a decent job showing products in action. Their board featuring gorgeous workspaces makes me want to run right out and buy all their products. Nicely played, Kikki.k. Mission accomplished.

Favorite Board: Journal Prompts

Based off Kikki.k’s popular journals, this board features writing prompts. I love the concept, but the photos aren’t sexy enough to get much traction. If they really wanted to get some attention, they should use a kick ass graphic designer to mock up the prompts with some simple and unique typography.

So how do you use Pinterest without ruining it for those who adore it?

First of all, don’t jump on the bandwagon just because Mashable tells you to.

The one thing keeping me sane about the Pinterest explosion is that if you start spamming people or your content isn’t pretty enough, you’ll never getting your stuff repinned. Meaning right now (for now) its hard to game the system.

So since the site is mostly used for inspiration, if you have a blog about blogging you might be shit out luck. While I might create a board for my travels or the books I’ve read just to test it out, if you ever catch me trying to pimp my content you have my full permission to take me out back and shoot me.

What do you think, are your panties in a knot over brands finally discovering Pinterest? Have you ever even heard of it before? Could you care less?

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